One of the places we're looking to hold the wedding is the Fort Worth Botanical Gardens. I know that we couldn't hold it in the Japanese Garden. I can't even look at the website without a mixed sense of unease and amusement.
One fine afternoon, Chris, Alex and I took a trip out to the gardens. The Japanese Garden is a featured part of the Gardens. It has a souvenir shop and an admission fee. There are lots of bonsai trees, an enormous rock garden and a giant pond runs throughout. In the pond there are bright orange, white, grey and multi-colored coi fish.
Coi fish are basically ridiculously over-priced carp. Goldfish are carp. I used to buy a dozen goldfish for $3. A single coi costs about $500 for a small one, assuming you find someone who sells them and are willing to buy the thousands of dollars of equipment required to keep the bastards alive.
The fish at the Japanese Gardens are *huge*--more than a foot long and bigger around than if you make a circle with both hands. We had gone most of the way around the pond, all the while feeding the fish from the fish food dispensers located along the path. They'd swarm and push each other out of the way. Then we noticed a majestic white crane perched on a rock at the end of the pond. I told Chris about the day my sister and I took the boys to the park and saw a crane.
Honestly, we just wanted to feed the turtles and fish. We walked along the edge of the pond tossing in bread. A crane was there and followed about ten feet behind us as we walked. We waited for him to eat some bread. He just looked at it. Suddenly, he struck at the water, pulled out a fish and swallowed it whole. He had been using us to bait his lunch. He caught two more fish before we ran out of bait.
We had run out of quarters and Chris was the only one left with food. He started tossing it toward the crane. At first the fish didn't go that way and then they got braver. The crane started bobbing his dead and bouncing on one leg. Chris kept tossing the food. Alex and I watched along with a family who was also enjoying the day in the Gardens. I commented how the crane couldn't possibly be dumb enough to try to eat a fish that gigantic. I was correct.
The crane bounced and watched for what felt like a very long time. Just as I started to say see-I-told-you-so, he dove. He was in the pond over his head- only the very tips of his wings stuck out of the water. It happened so fast I almost thought I imagined it except that when he was again perched on the rock, he had a small, bright orange fish in his beak.
-*gasp*!
-Oh. My. God.
-WHOA! Cool!
-Did you see that?!?
-Dad! The bird! the fish! the bird!
-You know those fish cost a small fortune
The poor girl had her hand over her mouth and looked mortified. We all nervously laughed and stared. The crane flew to the other side of the pond and swallowed his very expensive dinner. He didn't look impressed.
Despite the lack of evidence, we quickly walked away from the scene of the crime. As we walked toward the exit, we saw a security guard walking hurriedly in the direction of the commotion. We said hello and kept walking.
I really don't think I could be married there without a severe case of the giggles in the middle of the ceremony...especially if we serve sushi.
