Footballs and armchairs don't mix

Yesterday, Alex's team lost the city championship.  It was an exciting game, but in the end, it was still a loss.  Some of the kids were like me- for a second they were mad and then they were sad and then they realized it was *one* game.  My son realized it first, I think.  He looked at the teary-eyed kids and told them there were ten other teams who would have loved to have played that game and they knocked them out of the competition by beating every one of them.  A win would have been nice, but it was still a great season. 

I was at every game, every practice... cheering my son on...and my ""adopted"" sons.  Alex calls two other kids brothers.   The coaches call more of them our step-sons.  We've had half the team at our house at one point or another.  The birthday party, Six Flags, sleep overs, whatever.  I really love some of those kids.  It's been a great two years being an Eagle. 

Chris ran the website for the team this year and gave rides to kids to the games and home from practice.  I organized the parent t-shirt sale and the end of the year potluck.  We've volunteered any time we could because we wanted the team to be successful. 

I can tell you that I wouldn't have driven from Dallas to Grapevine to Irving three or four days a week for any other team.  I really respect and admire the coaches.  Those men are truly dedicated.  They took a  group of twenty-five hard-headed, very dissimilar kids and made them into a team.  It took way more than a uniform.  They worked them out and taught them everything they could.  They treated all the boys the same.  So why are parents complaining it wasn't fair? 

Our head coach explained at the start of the year that the 11 best kids would start offense and the 11 best would start defense and come play-offs, if your kid wasn't in either group, your kid wouldn't be playing.  I think a lot of the problem is that the complaining parents didn't go to practice.  And the ones that did sat there on their laptops or in the parking lot smoking and gossiping.  Our team is not the team to join if your child needs to be treated as an equal.  All the kids are treated the same, but not as equals.  My son had to run to the first pole for every fumble he made even though league rules say he's too heavy to run the ball.  Is that fair?  Yes, it is.  He is expected to play just as well as any other kid.

It absolutely chafed my ass during the game to hear our coaches being second-guessed by an absolute moron.  This guy was telling the coach's wife that we needed to run this play or that play.  He was too stupid to realize that those were the plays being run, but the kids had made a couple of mistakes.  He was supposed to run one way and went another.  Not the coach's fault.  So what are you gonna do?  Yell at a ten year-old?  That's exactly what that ass did after the game.  Yelled at his kid right in the face.  What purpose did that serve?  He went on about how if HE was a coach he would always win.  I finally had it.  I told him to get a team and next year when he played the Eagles I'd come and laugh right in his face when he lost.  He said ""all you have to do is pass.""  We passed and were damn-near intercepted.  He went on and on.  I went off on his retarded ass..him and his loud-mouthed wife and whoever else was there egging him on.  Told them kids need coaching and if he didn't know that then all his arm-chair coaching was pointless.  I made him feel pretty damn stupid.  I looked at each of them right in the face and just wanted someone to say something.  No one did.

None of the kids on our team came out of the womb as superstars.  My son was lost when he joined the team last year and this year he started on defense in the start of the year and on offense all year.  That didn't happen cuz of genetics.  God knows the kid didn't get it from me.

I didn't get to play in sports as a kid.  I was clumsy and the parents wouldn't allow it anyway.  I am very happy that I was able to give my son a chance to play.  I was so proud when he would take the field.  I'm proud of the way he kept trying when he didn't get it and the way he helped other kids get it when they were struggling.  It's made him more confident, eat healthier and want to exercise.  It's made him tougher and more independent.  Playing football as an Eagle has been an important part of making him the man he will become.  I am very thankful to Bob, Robert and Larry for pushing Alex to be the best person he can be and not content to be just like everyone else.

No Honey for me :-(

My husband flew to Arkansas yesterday on business.  And from what he said, they don't even have the stuff set up right so he can do anything there.  They were supposed to, but they don't.  So he's there eating up to $75 worth of dinner on the company credit card and I'm here eating San Diego's Tacos.  Well, actually, I like San Diego's Tacos, but that's beside the point.  Point is that I'm here and he's not.

 I'm so bummed.  I didn't realize how big this house was.  I couldn't fall asleep last night.  I've eaten lunch two days in a row with NO Honey.  Hogging the bed is not as much fun.  What's the point of lying across the bed diagonally if there's not legs to put mine on top of? What's the point of wrapping myself up like a burrito if there's no one to try and get the comforter away from me? 

AND I don't even get him back until Thursday night.  As Jessica says, ""super-duper sad face"".   Super sad...

I don't know what to think

Currently, I live in a nice house in a nice neighborhood and we have enough money to pay all our bills and still afford a nice Christmas without putting a dime on a credit card.  Life is good, but it was not always so. 

Once upon a time, not so long ago... wait, that's a Bon Jovi song. 

*sigh* 

Ok, let's say: About 11-12 years ago, I was the definition of Working Poor.  I worked and had no money.  I was always struggling and stressing and then I was pregnant.  Although my ass didn't have insurance from my shitty part-time job, I did get prenatal care from a clinic I was referred to by the pregnancy crisis center before I moved back home.  They had a nice facility that had evening hours with doctors, nurses, lactation consultants, the works.  I am very grateful to that place.  I may have to Google them and mail them a check.  Places like that need support.  Yes?

Chris and I were watching a recording of 20/20 tonight that focused on Memphis and the high infant mortality rate.  In Memphis, a baby dies every 42 hours.  That absolutely Blows My Mind.  And I want to help those babies.  And I want to beat their mothers.  These girls, some 16, some 12 years old are getting pregnant. I'm so conflicted.  Alex wasn't planned.  It happens.  I understand.  What I don't understand is how it keeps happening and happening.  One girl had FIVE premie babies and two died.  FIVE!  What the bloody fuck?!?  Nothing on tv?  Read a damn book. 

The show said something like 250 premie babies died in 2006.  Where is the personal responsibility and accountability of the 250 mothers and fathers?  Yes, let's not leave out their MIA daddies.  The girl they focused on said her baby-daddy didn't talk to her after he found out she was pregnant.  As the show went on, they shared that he was a thug and shot dead when the baby was two months old. 

They showed the mass burials the county provides.  It broke my heart seeing those little coffins made out of scrap lumbar laid side by side in one big hole and covered up like a landfill.  I am so confused.  My compassion and my anger are at odds with each other.  The whole thing just irritates the living piss out of me.  I don't have a point.  I don't know if the city should just put birth control in the tap water.  I want to help babies but their parents are so stupid.  Maybe that's the reason for the infant deaths.  I don't know if you subscribe to God or Darwin, but either way...  They're just too damn stupid to reproduce and maybe those deaths are mercy for the life they would have lived.

what am I going on about?

My son said to me that dinner tonight was the best Mexican food he ever tasted.  Shh.  Don't tell Mama.  I've spent some time trying to duplicate her cuisine and I think I'm getting closer.  That lady is something else.  I think I ate beans and rice at least five times a week from the time I can remember until I was 18 and it always tasted good.  I don't think I ever got tired of chicken and rice.   I can't speak for every member of the family.  I distinctly remember Veronica and Kristina talking about clucking and growing feathers if they had chicken one more time. 

We were a six-member, one income household and Mexican food is inexpensive to cook.  Rice, beans, chicken, tortilla ingredients...I think I probably spent $8.00 on dinner for the three of us tonight and still have leftovers. 

Is it weird to identify FOOD with fun, family, gatherings and a sense of satisfaction with life?  maybe that's why I'm so fat. 

Irene brought breakfast to work on Friday.  She made chorizo-bean and chorizo-egg tacos.  I had three with her fabulous homemade salsa.  We got to talking about making tortillas.  Both our moms used a whole bag of flour everytime they made masa.  We both use a couple of cups of flour when we cook.  I told her that I never wanted to learn how to make tortillas when I was young.  My mom used to tell me that my husband would expect me to make them.  (I think at the time she still expected me to marry a Mexican)  I told her I couldn't imagine a man worth the effort.   My guys are worth it and now I make them... mostly on weekends and nights there's not football practice.  It's taken some trial and error, but I'm pretty happy with my current recipe.  Ok, I don't really have a  recipe, but I throw stuff in a bowl pretty much in the same ratios more consitently.

Yeah, I'm turning into my mother.  This isn't news; it's been happening slowly over time.  The process seems to be speeding up as time goes by.  I don't fight it.  I just buy more hair dye.

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On a different note...  This is the time of the year when I start asking when the family is gathering next year.  I'm asking.  What city are we invading come summertime 2009?

One of our own

I've only been married three months, but I've had the same conversation dozens of times now with friends and several Casual Aquaintances. 

CA:  So... when are you and Chris having more kids?
Me:  We have one.  We're good.
CA:  No, really.  Don't you want to have a baby?
Me:  I had one.
CA:  Don't you want another one?
Me:  Not really.
CA:  And Chris is okay with that?
Me:  Yes.
CA:  I don't believe it.
Me:  You don't know Chris.
CA:  I can't believe he doesn't want one of his own.  
Me:  We have Alex.  He's plenty.
CA:  Most men want one of their own.  You just watch.
Me:  Yeah.  I'll do that.

My husband and I discussed this before we were married.  I think we had the conversation before we were engaged.  He's not trying to "spread his seed", "sow his oats", "carry on his name" or whatever it is that makes a man want to impregnate a woman. 

First of all, it might kill me and he likes me alive.  I love my son, but I had him when I was 21 and healthy and I still ended up in the hospital, strapped to my bed, heavily medicated (not with the good drugs) and in labor for 61 hours before I finally pushed out his big head.   At which point, I was hospitalized for an additonal four days.

Second, my son has told me under no uncertain terms that he doesn't want siblings of any kind.  Ever.  He's had this opinion since he could talk and reminded me the other day that he's not changed his mind.

Third, in about eight years I'll be sending the boy off to college.  I will cry my eyes out as I leave him in his dorm.  I will think about him everyday and send cards and care packages all the time.  I'll call him and email and myspace him.  And then I'll spend the weekend in Austin with my husband just because we can, have sushi for dinner, walk around my house naked if I feel like it....  I can't do those things if there's a 7 year old running around.

Fourth, we have one of our own.  Tonight as we were looking over Alex's take home papers, there was a worksheet Chris and Alex worked on together.  One was marked wrong.  Chris said he was glad most of the questions were right in case the teacher asked him who helped him with it.  Alex said, ""My dad"".  Last week when someone asked who was taking one of the kids home from football practice, the coach's wife said, ""He's going with Alex's dad"".  On Sunday when Alex beat Chris on Madden, he asked, ""so how does it feel to get beat by your own kid?""  When the boy had been acting up I had no problem telling Chris that his child was crazy.

So thanks for your concern...  Never say never...  BUT - No, we're not planning on getting me knocked up... not on purpose anyway. So if one day I end up preggers, you can throw me a baby shower and tell me you told me so.  If that day never comes,  don't look for me to adopt.

Not *in* your eye, Mrs. Morris

When I first entered the house I now live in, it was to watch Fight Club with my new friend who had never seen it before.  As soon as I sat on his couch I realized that either cats lived there or had in the past.  My eyes started tearing, my nose started running and my face started swelling.  I took a roll of toilet paper from his bathroom and we made it through the movie.

As time went by and my friend became My Honey and I started staying over on the weekends, I would clean his house.  He thought it was because I'm really nice or have some kind of cleaning obsessive compulsive disorder.  Nah.  I'm just really allergic to cat hair..and it was everywhere.  It was on the couch cushions, in the carpet, on the baseboards, in the dust on the windowsills.  Every weeekend I'd clean a little more so I could breathe a little easier.  Chris even washed the covers on the couch cushions for me.  It's gotten better.

The thing about cat hair is that it clings in hiding places you'd never think to look.  Last weekend when I was cleaning I had an asthma attack when I inadvertently turned up more cat hair.  I think it was when I changed the vacuum bag.  Sadly, the vacuum did not suck up all the cat hair.

Last night, while on the phone with my good friend Scott, I felt something in my eye.  It was bothering me in a big way.  I was working up tears and moving my eyelid.  I rinsed with water and it was still irritated beyond belief.   Finally, after rinsing with wetting solution I got the irritant out.  I looked at my face and my eye looked puffy, but I assumed it was just from the rubbing.

I woke up this morning with my eye swollen almost shut.  No redness, nothing in it, just big, swollen and slanted.  I looked like I had down syndrome.  It was very distressing.  I iced it and it helped a little, but Chris took me to the optometrist (opthamologist?) who dyed my tears, examined me and determined nothing was actually in my eye, but it was probably an allergic reaction.  I'm allergic to quite a few things, but the only thing that makes me swell up?  Yes, friggin cat hair.  It cost us our $100 deductible to find out that I had cat hair in my eye.  The doctor told me to put some cortizone on the lid, not in my eye.  He repeated that twice ""not in your eye, Mrs. Morris.""  I guess I still had some of that down syndrome look going on. 

It still feels a little puffy and irritated, but it's mostly better.  Did you know that Visine makes drops with antihistimine in them now?  Twice the cost of regular drops, but well worth it in this instance.  When the swelling goes down all the way I'll be going back to that nice doctor to get my vision checked.  Hey, deductible is paid, the whole family can have exams!

Chris told me I should stop cleaning so much.  He said the cat hair had been sitting there minding its own business when I stirred it up.  Yeah.  He thinks he's funny.

My blogs are boring

It's true.  Nothing exciting has been happening to me.  I'm just living a happy, drama-free life.  I apologize if that makes for a pitiful blog.  Also, my blog had somehow become mandatory reading material at work and while part of me doesn't care, part of me doesn't want to share more of myself with those people.  My page is no longer public...just one more way to have less drama.    I was telling my husband about my boring blog and he said that I've become a soccer mom.  Say what?!?  I'm no fucking soccer mom.  I'm  a FOOTBALL mom!  BTW, my baby's team won the last game 42 - 0 (and still got yelled at for being lazy).  There was a crazy lady on the other side of the field screaming at our team not to hit the boys on the other team.  What the hell was she smoking?  How do you not tackle in football?  She screamed at our coaches that they only cared about winning the game.    What did she expect?  She must be one of those soccer moms.  Ick. 

I'm not remotely athletic or particularly competitive, but I believe in keeping score.  If you want your child to play a game where no one wins and no one loses and ability doesn't matter then your kid better have down syndrome.  But if he does, don't let him play football.  All that helmet switching will only confuse him.  And for the record, the Special Olympics have winners and losers.  Retarded kids accept that some people are better are certain things.  Why grown women of normal i.q. don't understand that just escapes me.  They need to stop taking their child's Ritalin and accept reality.  Your kid's not perfect?  Mine either.  Life's like that. 

I'm turning into my mother.  I went to the bathroom the other day at work.  I was in the stall and let out a big ""aaaaaaahhhhhhhh"" of relief.  right. out. loud.  Then I started laughing uncontrollably. right. out. loud.  I'm hovering there, hand on the wall, tissue in hand wondering if I'll topple over if I try to wipe and unable to control my laughter.  I can only wonder what people were thinking.  No one said anything as they flushed or washed their hands.  For some reason it brought to my mind that scene from Carrie in the girls locker room when they started throwing maxi pads at her and that killed the laughter.  You know, those were some fat pads.  Did you know they still make pads that thick?  What's that about?  I don't know about you, but I don't have an extra two inches of space between my body and my underwear.  I don't want to walk around feeling like I've got a couch cushion between my thighs.  Sometimes when I'm in the feminine hygiene aisle, I wonder what kind of self-abusive person buys those.  I wonder that her life is like.  I wonder what other weird things she does to punish herself and make life less pleasant.  One day I may write a story about her.  I think I'll name her Norma.

We went and saw Igor.  Don't waste your money.

I've been noticing more and more women with tattoos on their necks and behind their ears.  I can't believe they don't know how trashy they look.  And don't get me wrong, I love tattoos.  When I retire, I plan on sleeving my arm and getting a Harley.  It will be so sweet.  But I hate homemade looking tattoos with unfortunate placement.  I'm a big believer that nothing should go below the wrist, below the ankle or above the collarbone.  Everything else is fair territory.  Please remember people: Good tattoos are not cheap and cheap tattoos (make you look like an escaped convict) are not good.  Spend the money- it's cheaper than laser removal.

Ok, I think I'm done for now.  Back to my boring life.  I'm gonna go grab my husband so I can have my way with him.

Being a parent sucks sometimes

I take my child to football practice three days a week and watch every moment of warm-ups, drills and play practice.  I count along with warm up and critique my baby's efforts.  Today he left his Gatorade in the truck so I walked out to the parking lot and when I came back, my child is kneeling on the ground with a coach looking at his back and he's trying not to cry.  No one saw what happened.  The one time I turn my back for one minute, I miss something important.  Chris had not shown up for practice yet and everyone had someone else they were looking at that exact moment.  Then my child stood up put his helmet back on and did a few more drills.  Finally on the third one he walked off to the side and told the coach his back was still hurting.  His spine from between his shoulder blades to down about 8 inches.  The coaches think he went helmet to helmet or helmet to shoulder pads with the other kid.  There's no visible bruising or other symptoms.  I gave him some ibuprofen and Chris bought a heating pad for him.  He seems to be okay, but I am not happy.  I didn't even want to let him go to bed because now I'm convinced there could be a concussion.  I don't know if I should let him go to school tomorrow without having him checked out.  His backpack is heavy.  They change classes in fifth grade at his new school.  I don't want him lugging all that weight around all day.  I keep looking at his nostrils because Kristina said that spinal cord fluid would come out of his nose if it was really bad.  And the football mom part of me keeps thinking that now he'll keep his head up and hit low.  I can't believe that part of my brain won't shut up!  I think I'll be in and out of his room checking his breathing all night.  Know my child's biggest concern?  If he can still start on Saturday.  Right now it's a waiting game until morning.  I may have decided what I'll be doing by then. 

I am so sorry for every sprain, strain, fracture and freak accident that ever landed me in the E.R.  No wonder my mom is so nuts.  Well, she was nuts before she had kids, but I know I didn't help.  Say a little prayer for my baby.  I'm gonna go find a mirror to shove under his nostrils.<

I've tried to post this 3 times now

I'm tired and I can't sleep.  That's a bitch of a way to be.  My mind is restless and my back is grumbling.  I can't think straight, but I can't stop thinking.  So here I am… and here you are.  How 'bout that? 

Nothing pressing going on in my life.  Really the just day-to-day grind.  But I think I've got some kind of blogging bulimia or mental constipation.  One way or another, I need to get it all out.  Where to start?

Kodak is a large corporation whose so-called customer service cannot provide service and has no idea that customers keep them in business.  I talked to three different people who told me that not only could they not help me, but no one could.  What the hell kind of service is that?  Yesterday I placed an order at kodakgallery.com for prints and a photobook.  It's really neat.  I had one mailed to me and one to my mom each one was about $30.  I did not put in the coupon code for 35% off of photobooks when you buy $60 worth.  I called to see if I could get it applied or cancel and re-enter my order.  No and no.  I suggested that they could put the order through and credit my card for the difference.  Every time I suggested something the only answer was, ""The system won't let me do that.""  That system… I tell you.  Finally today, I called and asked the supervisor what she COULD do.  I already heard from everyone else all the things they couldn't do and I was very curious as to what, if any, service she could provide to me, the customer. I told her all about my previous dealings and she didn't seem impressed or have an answer as to why a customer service person would tell a customer that no one in the whole company could help them.  She said that all she could do was put a $10 credit on my Kodak account and it would be good for products or shipping and did I have anything else.  I can't say I feel valued.  I still am waiting for a callback from corporate.  I'll call again tomorrow and everyday until they talk to me. 

I've been feeling rather sluggish at work.  Tuesday I had a low-grade fever all day that neither Tylenol nor Advil could knock out.  Leland was talking to me and I could feel the sweat beads forming on my forehead and I heard him talking, but it was like my brain had to translate the sounds into words.  I tried to function, but I don't think I was ever at 100%.  Today I just felt blah.  I'm not sure if I'm fighting off a cold or what, but I'm not liking it and I'm sure that I have not been the most pleasant person.

Alex's team lost their second game of the season.  It will probably be the only loss this season, but I was really hoping to see them win.  It was a good game though.  Both teams are talented and it came down to two good plays by the other team.  We'll see them in the playoffs, I'm sure.  On the upside, the uniforms are just gorgeous. When I first saw the green pants I thought they were ghetto, but they look sharp.  We're talking mini NFL players out there and they're very slimming on the big boys.  I think we take our team pictures in October and I'll definitely be putting one of those up. 

I came home tonight and crashed.  I only meant to lie down for a minute before starting dinner.  Chris woke me up about an hour and half later when he got home.  He heated up leftovers for dinner.  I feel so lazy and useless.  It's not like I'm at home all day, but I should be able to manage cooking dinner two or three nights a week.  My Honey is so awesome.  I did argue with him this week, but that's mostly my fault.  I'd been bottling stuff up and decided to hit him with it all at once.  It's not a nice thing to do to a person.  The sad thing is, he's stuck with me.  Poor thing.   Ah well, he can't say he wasn't warned.  My own mother asked him repeatedly if he was sure.  I'll try to be nicer.

Lately I've been concerned with stories people tell me.  I think I'm too cynical to be a good listener…that and people lie.  I stop short of calling people liars, but I have made it clear that I know what's what.  I have put one person in a position of supplying proof or shutting the hell up.  The silence that's followed is truly a blessing.

I think I'd like to take a road trip or something.  I need a nice three-day weekend and I don't think there's one coming up soon.  I'd like to go visit my mom.  I've never really gotten used to not being able to see her all the time.  When I finally settle down from the day and think to call her, it's usually 10:30 or so and I know she's probably getting into bed for the night.  I need a blackberry so can schedule calls on my outlook and see the reminders pop up on my phone.  That, or a note on the fridge so I remember to call on the weekend. 

Motorola has yet to send the replacement for my phone battery.  The phone holds about a two minute charge and dies.  Currently it's plugged in at the office.  I forgot to bring it home tonight.   That's part of why I haven't called anyone.  Thing is no one's called me either.  I'm not good at keeping in touch.  I haven't even sent out thank you cards from the wedding.  Think if I wait a little longer I can do a Thank You Merry Christmas card?  I feel like I'm losing touch.  Disconnected.  I don't know if I've changed or if others have changed, but it seems like I have less and less to say to fewer people.  Well, at least there's you.

I feel like I've purged some of my mental backlog.  Perhaps now I'll be able to sleep.

Ike who?

Despite the warnings of 60 mph winds and 24 hour storms, we're doing just fine.  The Dallas area had drizzles and some light winds, but not a whole lot else.  Alex's football game took place in the rain.  Our umbrella broke, but we stayed in the stands cheering.  It was the first official game of the season and they won 24-0. 

Next week we take on the one team we lost to last year.  I can't wait to see them lose.  Is that wrong?  That bald-headed traitor who was on our team last year is on the other team.  She's such an evil cow.  The drama that woman caused does not make any sense.  That's ok.  I think it's like that movie with Alicia Silverstone where they take a piece of that white chick's hair.  Her hair falls out only if she's mean.  Well, this chick is probably what inspired that part of the story, only she hasn't figured out she needs to stop being a hateful, nasty, trouble-making colon polyp. 

I'm thinking about going to the mall to have my eyebrows done.  I think the last time I had them done was two months ago. I've had a cold this week, but other than that, we're doing well. Hope everyone is healthy and happy. Love you!

Doodling hardcore

My son does not love reading.  I blame myself.  I should have read more to him as a child.  His new school has mandatory reading of 150 minutes per week.  They don't even care what he reads.  He still fights it.  I need to get over to Half Price Books and let him pick out some new material.  I found out tonight that his teacher gave him a book of Mr. Edgar Allen Poe and my son struggled for two hours to read a story and didn't even understand it at the end.  He could not begin to tell me what it was about.  Age clouds memory, but I still remember being more literate at that age and I trust that memory. 

Hm.

Perhaps it is not a bad thing that he doesn't read much.  I think part of the reason my mind is so warped is all the stuff I read as a kid.  I used to read Stephen King's works, among others.  Good stories full of all kinds of stuff...and I'm not just talking scary, gory, stuff.  Oh no, murder, pooping, homosexuality, spousal abuse, sex, infections, mutations, late-blooming telekinetics, you-name-it...  I wasn't allowed to watch tv if one of my parents didn't turn it on, but I could read anything I wanted.  I like to think I'm smarter for it, but who knows at this point? 

Yeah so...  Life is good.  I'm working on making more dinners at home.  It's cheaper and whatnot.  Plus we talk more at home.  Although since I thought Alex had football, I didn't defrost anything so we went to Spring Creek cuz we had a coupon.  But if you have a quick, easy recipe or something to go in the Crock Pot, let me know. 

Work is work.  Overall, good things are happening for the company.  Also, there are fewer moments of frustration.  Leland is my role model.  I think I may have aimed too high, but I keep trying.  His patience and people skills elude me.  I still call people crackheads and allude to their ability to qualify for the Special Olympics.  But, I'm getting better at not responding to pissiness with pissiness.  I have not perfected it, but I manage more often than not.  Although last week and the week before my back was spasming and I had bolts of pain through my hips so I may not have been Mary Sunshine for a while there.  I'm a work in progress--that's the story of my life, but it's an  interesting story and the plot twists are endless.  Honestly, I've been trying to be good.   I even made it into the offfice on time twice last week.   Leland keeps working his ass off with payoffs coming slow...like years after step 1, but he stays positive.  I'll take a page from his book.  Hell, if he ever writes a book, I may be the one to type it so I'll just keep a copy.

Football is the center of our lives.  I accept this with various emotions on any given day.  The trip from Dallas to Grapevine to Irving 3 times a week gets annoying, but my baby loves it and he's really good this year so I suck it up. Today's scrimmage was cancelled due to the rain.  Last year we practiced in the rain all the time unless there was lightning.  The IBFA keeps cancelling it for all the teams when it so much as drizzles.  I wonder if someone got sick last year.  I bet some kid practiced in the rain and his parents didn't make him take a warm shower and he got bronchitis.  Then his parents complained and threatened a lawsuit.  Maybe they even got a non-disclosed settlement as hush money.  Yup.  I make stuff up.  Usually I keep it to myself or bother Chris with it, but hey, you're here so I may as well share.  Don't get me started on the Frio River on the way to Laredo....

I finally got the disk from the photographer with the wedding pictures.  That woman took 2,000 photographs.  I shit you not.  One day I'm going to get prints done and mail some to you.  Until then...

fornit some fornus

It's like Family Circle Magazine

Just call me Betty Crocker.  I made dinner tonight from a recipe Alex saw in a magazine.  I also made tortillas.  It was all very tasty.   We all sat down together and Alex ate every bite, including the vegetables.  I know that's a normal thing for lots of people, but it's new and different to me.  I gotta say that I like it.

We also went to the mall today.  Steve and Barry's is awesome, but they need more people to keep their racks organized.  It took way too much effort to find Chris new jeans.  But I got down on the floor and shelf by shelf we found him what he needed. 

We went to Alex's opening ceremonies Saturday.  If you need a schedule, let me know.  It's good to have support on the sidelines. 

Tomorrow, we'll be at Six Flags again.  We each have a free coupon and Alex is taking his friend from his team.  We'll probably give away the others to random people who will think we're trying to scam them by saving them money.  People are so untrusting.  I can't say I blame them, but it's always annoying to try and give people free stuff and have them cop an attitude. 

I think we're going to Mama's house for Thanksgiving.  I think we'll be in Iowa in July and maybe Indiana that same week or two of vacation.  I'm not sure yet.  But it would be good to see folks.  If you want to see us, you know where we are.  HUGS!

Saturday

We just got home from the first pre-season game.  Eagles beat the Bulldogs 42-6.  My baby is starting this year and looking rather awesome out there.  We had a delay due to lightning in the area.  Better safe and all.  Our star quarterback took a hit during a scrimmage so we had one of our backups fill in.  No passing, only hand-offs, but still a good show.  The stands were crowded, which is great.  Last year's attendance wasn't too great until the playoffs.  I'm hoping the enthusiasm stays high.  The team is good and will only get better.  I'll keep you posted.

Time really seems to be flying.  School starts Monday.  Alex got his mohawk cut off today.  The new school does not allow mohawks or spikey hair.  They say it's distracting.  That's a load of crap.  I can't imagine if I didn't do my homework and had the nerve to blame someone's haircut.  I'm pretty sure my mom would have hit me with something.  But, people always need to have something to blame so...  He has a short haircut, which looks good, but he is not happy about.  Tomorrow I'll dye what's left of the top brown again because the green is even more distracting than spikeyness.  I just didn't have the heart to do it all in one day.

We also went and got new shoes.  He said he didn't need them, but I can't have him show up looking homeless on the first day of school.  The rest of the year he can look homeless, but not the first day. 

Tomorrow, we'll be at Six Flags.  Yay us!

On a side note:  I really wish I had a muscle relaxer for my back.  I finally used up the last of a prescription from two years ago that was supposed to last a month.  I'm not a druggy, but I'd happily pay for one of those babies right now. I'm off to bed.  Is it too early to ask who's going to be where for Thanksgiving?

My Baby’s Birthday Weekend--a week later

My baby's 11th birthday was last Friday.  He likes to tell me he's not my ""baby"", but I'm not hearing it.  Chris and I took the day off work and chilled on Friday with the boy until football practice at 6:30. 

I decided to keep it simple this year and just have some kids over at the house for a pool party on Saturday.  Alex invited his entire football team and about 6 or 7 daycare kids.  Fortunately, I only had a handful of kids show up.  They played in the pool and ate cake, pizza and ice cream.  Good times were had by all.  I asked the kids not to jump off the patio level down into the pool level.  They listened for about 20 minutes and then they were doing triple spins off the patio.  I was worried they'd land on each other or break their heads open, but it was uneventful.  (Thank God) 

One of the kids spent the night and went with us to Six Flags on Sunday, along with another boy we picked up on the way.  Learn from me, find out if the kids ride the rides before you go.  These kids wanted to ride the tea cups and the sombrero.  

Pretty exciting birthday, huh?  But wait, there's more...   Chris got SummerSlam pay-per-view as one of Alex's presents.  The three boys, plus Damien were on the couch watching the show.  I think the couch ended up about six feet back from its original position. 

They ALL stayed the night on Sunday.  They all go to the same daycare so Chris took them and signed them in Monday morning after I made them breakfast.  You've never seen kids so happy to have bacon. 

Alex had a good time, but I think he was tired of sharing his stuff by Sunday night.  I think if we have another sleep over, it will be ONE child for ONE night.  I think I handled it pretty well overall, but I was starting to feel a tad frazzled at the end.

We'll probably be having another pool party sometime next month.  Several kids had to miss the party for various reasons and they were pretty bummed about it.  With school starting back  up, they'll need a little stress reliever.

I'm assuming the birthday cards are just delayed in the mail somehow.

I have issues

Life is good.  I'm happy, healthy and doing well.  I love being married.  I love my wonderful Honey.  I love my green-haired kid.  I really can't think of a way things could be better...except maybe to win the lottery. 

So I really don't know why I've been in such a funky mood lately.  I'd say PMS, but that ain't it.  I just get pissy thinking about stupid stuff that really doesn't matter. 

I've spent way too much time being upset over cake.  That's right, I said cake.  The caterer cut up the top tier of my wedding cake.  And it's not that I wanted to eat year old cake on my anniversary.  The top tier was amaretto cake with strawberry filling.  We got the rest of the cake white so picky people wouldn't complain and because Chris's mother is allergic to strawberries so he didn't want the rest of the tiers to have strawberry.  Well, my mother-in-law and everyone else loved the amaretto/strawberry cake.  I didn't even taste it.  I didn't even see it cut.  And when my MIL said that she loved the cake and ate around the strawberry, I thought to myself, ""Did they use strawberries for garnish?""  I didn't realize until days later that they cut MY cake.  I have a ton of white cake that I don't want in my refrigerator that I'll be throwing away soon.  I know it shouldn't, but it irritates me every friggin time.  I picked it out because I wanted it.  I got talked into not getting the whole cake that way to appease the masses and that's what everyone loved.  Chris said he could go have the bakery make a replica now or for our anniversary.  If he does, I think I'll beat him.  I don't want to, but I don't know if I'll be able to stop myself.  It makes me so mad.  I know it's irrational.  I know I should calm down.   I can't.  It pisses me off beyond all reason.  I think of how everyone told me how good the cake was and how they looked at me like I was stupid when I said it was just white cake with bavarian cream.  I got so many looks like I was a retard.  I understand them now and it only makes me madder.

I know you're reading this and thinking I am a retard for being emotionally unstable over cake.  I don't care.  I hope that getting this off my chest helps me let it go.  Doesn't seem to have worked.

words in a blog

I'm tired and incoherent.   Blogging anyway.

I'm back from Vegas.  It was a good time.  I ate a lot, but walked more so I think I came out about the same.  I had no real luck gambling.  We saw the Bodies exhibit.  I recommend it if it comes to your town.  I also saw Louie Anderson.  He was funny.  His cartoon was awesome.  Vegas is big.  If I ever go again, I'm gonna get one of those things that you ride on standing up.

The wedding went off rather well.  Of course, I was hidden for the beginning so I missed the procession.  I can't wait for the pictures from the photographer.  My dad wore the tux.  He fought it like a toddler fights a nap, but in the end he looked amazing.  My sisters got all dolled up and looked fabulous too.  I didn't know until after it was over that they had been standing in an anthill and were bitten repeatedly by fire ants.  If it had been me, I would have been cussing up a storm.  As I came down the aisle, I looked at Chris and he was tearing up so I looked at my mom who was on the verge of losing it and then looked at the minister.  I did not want to cry.  The muscle in my left cheek started spasming all weird like when your eyelid flutters uncontrollably.  The photographer was clicking away.  Oh well.

I did lose it several times the day before and the day of the wedding. I love my family, but I had all of them all at once criticizing about one thing or another.  Chris and I spent 6 months pulling this wedding together.  No one put in so much as a single M&M, but it seemed like just about everyone had something negative to say...except my mom.  I realize now that I was overstressed, hadn't slept right in about 3 weeks and was probably hyper-sensitive, but at the time my anger and paranoia seemed perfectly rational.

 At the rehearsal, I saw the chair rental place had set up the wrong color chairs.  We asked for white and they put up dark gray.  I had a moment where I wanted to cry.  It seemed like people were just trying to piss me off and I didn't understand it.  I told myself they were just chairs, but I really felt upset over it. 

The chair cover lady called to tell me that the place wasn't open.  I asked if she had called the guy to open it like I had told her on the phone and in an email. Nope.  Chris told her the place would be open at 8:30 a.m.  The guy, Niles, went to open the place as soon as I called him.  I called her back and told her that he was coming.  She was happy.  I was annoyed.  I had set up the whole deal and been talking to her for the past few months.  Why would she try to go around me?  Well to get a wrong answer that she liked better, of course!

We were at the hall decorating and I asked for the centerpieces they had promised to provide.  No one told Niles, who was the third person we had dealt with..  His mom came from home and started snapping at me.  He's not the decorator or the coordinator.. I just rented the place.  I told her I knew that and calmed her down and then she was very nice.  Turns out he had been in a motorcycle accident the night before and she was worried about him.  Still, I didn't need that.  They made an agreement with a signed contract.  Why was I the one being yelled at?

The caterer called while we were decorating that she had to use the stove and it was $50.  wtf?  We had told her that she couldn't use it and she agreed.  Now it was urgent.  I told her that was fine because I didn't want to argue, but I was pissed that she was pulling that 2 hours before the ceremony.  I met her partner who confirmed that the woman is flaky as a rule.  I didn't pay the $50, but if the hall requests it, I guess I have to for agreeing to it. 

My uncle convinced my dad to leave my wedding early so they could be a day early for a funeral.  I could punch my uncle in the face and throat.  Right as the d.j. was announcing the father-daughter dance, I had to signal him that it wasn't happening.  I felt like such a retard and had to fight really hard not to cry.  Then I had to go ask Chris for the housekey because I hadn't brought my purse and he got pissed that my dad was leaving.  I so didn't need more drama, but he was mad and went to talk to my dad.  At that point I sat down at the bar and had a  beer.  I decided that I was still married and I still had lots of family and friends there and it wasn't the end of the world.  Still, I could punch my uncle in the face.  He could have slept at my house and left the next day like they had already agreed to.  No, he drove to Laredo on no sleep because he had been working and was tired so he drove another 8 hours straight rather than sleep.  Does that make any sense to any sane person? 

Wow, that's a lot of complaining.  Actually, it was a really happy day.  Everyone looked amazing, the food was good, the music was good, the hall looked better than I expected and I'm still married to the best guy in the world.  I'm glad that I got my dad to walk me down the aisle.  I'm glad my sisters stopped arguing long enough to be bridesmaids.  I'm thankful for everything people did to help me out. Kristina combed my hair and fixed my garters.  Juana tied my corset.  I couldn't even tie my own shoes.  I was even thankful when my dad would yell up the stairs and tell us to hurry up and my mom would yell back that we were coming.  It made it more normal somehow. 

I especially want to thank my family for being themselves even though I wasn't myself.

Thank you to everyone who helped with the cook out and clean-up the night before.

Thank you to everyone who helped decorate the hall and gazebo and whatnot.

Thanks to everyone who took pictures.

I want to thank everyone who came to the wedding whether from up the road or across the country.

I want to thank everyone who sent gifts, cards and money...and even if you didn't but you really wanted to, thanks to you too.

Thanks to Mama for watching Alex while Chris and I were in Las Vegas.

Thanks to Alex for being such a good sport.

Thank you to my husband for putting up with all my crap and still going through with the wedding anyway.

I love my family, whether they were there from the day I was born or just got dragged in this week.  Thank you.  I wouldn't be half as crazy or nearly as sane without you.

quick thoughts

Chris and I went to see Get Smart last night.  It was so funny.  I laughed through the whole movie.  I recommend it.  I can't say a whole lot more than that without giving away the funny stuff. 

Two weeks till the wedding.  I'm looking forward to seeing everyone. 

I had grilled jalepenos on my Whataburger.  I asked for grilled onions, but I was hungry so I ate it.  Very tasty stuff. 

We went to El Fenix.  The fajitas were mediocre.  The other stuff looked good.

I have to shampoo the carpet and get dad's measurements to the tuxedo place today.  Mom and Dad will be here on July 11th...hopefully in time for the rehearsal at 7:00. 

I'm going to shower so I can hopefully start my day by noon.  Love you.

bloody hell

I was sitting at the stop light minding my own business when my truck decided to stop working.  It's currently at Firestone, which will run the diagnostic and report to me in the morning.  What shit.  Things have been going way too well lately.  I should have seen this one coming.  I know she's 12 years old with 150,000 miles on her, but I still expect her to run.  What shit.  I know I said that already.  I'll say it again.  I'm going to have to carpool now.  Chris usually goes to work about 9:30 or so and now he's going to have to get me to work at 8:00 a.m...and he's serious about getting me there on time.  I'm not serious about getting me there on time, but I don't think it matters.  

We should have registered at the car dealership.  Man.  What shit...

jumble

Where to start?  Less than a month from now, I'll be getting married.  Everything is booked or reserved or what-have-you.  It's go time. 

Chris and I went to the florist yesterday and decided on the bouquets.  I honestly don't remember everything we talked about.  I know there will be white roses and other stuff.  I took a lot of time making up my mind.  I shouldn't be given too many choices.  Ever.  I have the Chili's menu memorized and it still takes me fifteen minutes to decide on dinner.  I have every confidence the flowers will be lovely.  They're flowers afterall.  It's not like I'm using thistle.

People keep telling me I should get what I want because I'm the bride and it's up to me.  I get to marry the sweetest guy in the universe.  What else could I want?  Mrs. McQueary sent me an email asking what music I wanted for the bridesmaids and the march and my parents and if I wanted a song after the vows and dinner music.  I have spent the past three days listening to all of her suggestions on youtube.  I am no closer to deciding.  Chis and I wanted different music.  I told her to surprise me because no matter what she plays, I'll still be married after it's all said and done.

Tomorrow we're meeting with the Reverend for a counseling session.  Good times.  I filled out the answers on my copy.  Chris won't tell me what he got for number three because we're not supposed to discuss it.  I may bring up his inability to confide in me during the session.

We had been talking about going to the Texas coast for the honeymoon.  Changed our minds.  We'll be in Vegas for five days.  I wish I had paid more attention to Jane's explanation of playing poker.  Maybe we can do a crash course before she leaves.  I've never been to Vegas and I'm pretty excited about it.  I'll have to get a picture with an Elvis impersonator.

It's quiet without Alex around the house.  I actually read a book.  I didn't know that Judy Blume had written any adult books.  I just read Smart Women.  It's not Pulitzer material, but not a bad read.

My Honey has a cold.  I keep offering to go get him new meds.  He's taking some, but they're not working completely.  Poor Honey...

I keep trying to remember if there's something I'm forgetting.  There usually is.  I'm hoping after vacation, I'll come back a little clearer.  I need to find a new swimsuit.  Holler if you find one on clearance.

getting closer...

The wedding is next month and my skin is going nuts.  I finally had it clear and now it's the worst it's ever been.  Short of a laser treatment, I'm not sure what to do.  So sad.

So far, we've got about 32 people who have confirmed they will be there.  I just want a damn response.  It's a yes or no question and you don't have to buy a stamp.  What's with people?  I have to give the caterer a final head count and I need some cooperation.

I'm so ready to do this.  I still have to fold my favor boxes and get flowers.  I forgot to call the florist today.  There's a distint possibilty I'll be putting together bouquets with flowers I get from Kroger.

I'm getting ready to send Alex to the old folks next Sunday.  He's been talking about seeing Mama and eating her cooking everyday.  He is too funny.  I got Mama an outfit and she really likes it.  She even went and got new shoes from an actual department store. 

We cooked out tonight.  I smell like a steak so I'm off to shower. 

Oh yeah, Dad's birthday is tomorrow.

52 days and counting

I went out for a burrito at Chipotle tonight.  So yummy.  Alex doesn't like Chipotle, but he had already eaten dinner so it was just me and Chris.  (He makes me smile...sometimes when he doesn't mean to.  Monday at lunch, I heard him say ""E-eh-uh-lo"" and I was confused.  I thought he had been watching Dancing with Wolves.  Turns out he was pronouncing ice in Spanish.  I say it that way now too.  It's fun.  I recommend it. )

After dinner we went to the mall.  I walked into Frederick's and there was a fat chick working there, which made me very happy.  I explained that I was looking for a corset to wear under my wedding gown.  She had just the thing in my size.  Once I had it on, she came into the dressing room and strapped it all up for me.  I can't imagine a size zero woman trying to tie me up or what the poor dear would be thinking.  I look damn good in a corset.  I'm considering buying one in every color for each day of the week.  Screw breathing.  It's overrated anyway.  My Honey paid for it and chalked it up to ""wedding expenses""  Yay!  We also bought my shoes tonight.  Double yay! 

I'm feeling rather good.  We mailed out all the invitations today.  Go us!  Please let me know what you think.  I designed them myself.    We need to rent a keyboard for Mrs. McQueary.  Other than that, I think we're pretty much all set until we get a final head count.  I'm so happy!   I hope it rubs off on everyone I see.

Weekend & General Update

"

It was either Monday or Tuesday when I was sitting in my office, minding my own business, when my cell phone rang.  It was Lisa Thomas, she's the afternoon dj on Mix 102.9.  She was calling to inform me that I had won Lisa's Lunchbox.  She gave me a $50 gift certificate for Texas de Brazil.  Chris and I went to the radio station to pick it up.  I know he believes how lucky I am, but I'm still glad he can witness when I pick up prizes.  I don't know that I'd believe me if I didn't see it first-hand.  Chris, Alex and I went for dinner there on Friday.  Wow.  That was some tasty food.  Meat heaven.  I'd go again for a special occasion.  Adult dinners were almost $50 each.  Still, if you have the cash and the opportunity, go for it. 

Saturday I hung around the house most of the day.  Chris woke me up early to give me the opportunity to go for a 10k walk.  I think I mumbled something about kissing my ass.  I'm not sure.  It was early.  Saturday night, we went to Main Street Days in Grapevine.  We wandered, rode some carnie rides and listened to an AC/DC cover band.  I'm working on my impersonation.  It needs work.  Right now it's somewh0ere between a British muppet and a zombie.

Sunday, we once again found our way to Six Flags.  We rode Tony Hawk's Big Spin.  It was about a 40 minute wait, but worth it.  It twists and turns you all over the place.  It also records your face for the whole ride.  They'll sell you a dvd at the end for $20.  I passed.  Chris and Alex got on towards the end of the day.  They got in the single rider line and rode it three more times each.  I'm not sure why my son was willing to jump on that ride without hesitation, but I still can't talk him into riding the Batman.

The remainder of the invitations I was waiting on arrived today.  Finally, we can mail them!   I'm so looking forward to seeing everyone who can make it.  I'm curious to see who's willing to make the cross-country journey in the middle of July.  Should be interesting. 

I'm not sure how much decorating I want to do.  We can't get into the hall on Friday because they have a scheduled dinner, but we can get in Saturday at any time and be there pretty much all day.  I just don't know if I want to be there working that day. That would involve me waking up early.  I hate waking up early.  Then I have to figure out how much time it will take to get washed and dressed and make my hair pretty.  Everyone knows I can't manage time with an atomic clock.   I'm not sure how important decorations are.  

I'm shipping Alex off to visit my parents on June15th.  That gives him time after school lets out to chill for a while.  He's stoked about going down there and visiting the old folks.  Mom agreed to stay with Alex for a week while Chris and I hit the beach on our honeymoon.  At first, she said she didn't want to sit in the sun by the pool.  After I assured her there's shade, she agreed that she and Dad will housesit / babysit.  I don't know if Dad knows he's housesitting.  I'll let Mom explain it to him.

I still don't think my sisters have ordered their dresses.  I figured out how to fold the favor boxes.  I still don't know what's going in the boxes.  Can the boxes be the favors?  Some aspects of this wedding are really beautiful and classic.  Some parts are ghetto.  Some parts are a unique blending, much like a vintage Cadillac with spinners.  Just wait.  You'll see.  Hope to see you there.

hey you...

Chris and I saw Harold and Kumar escape from Guantanamo Bay on Friday.  I didn't see the original White Castle story, but somehow I managed to understand the story.  It was good for a laugh.  Saturday we saw 21, which was good, but not as good as I hoped.  Sunday, we all once again ended up as Six Flags.  Good times.

I didn't do a productive thing all weekend.  I didn't even mail the invitations, which was the one thing on my Thing-a-Doo list.  This weekend.  I will do it this weekend.  I will.  Really.  Chris has a new printer that's ready to address some envelopes.  We wanted to negotiate a hotel rate for people visiting from out of town and send that out on the info card.  I don't think that's going to happen afterall.  I'm just not feeling it.  I have every confidence in my friends' and family's ability to book hotel rooms independent of me. 

I'm wondering how many Mexicans we're going to have crammed in the house.  It should be fun.  I'm going to rent a rug shampooer.  I think we're going to have more guests than beds.  I can't remember what the count was at Veronica's house-warming.  (64, maybe?)  I better stock up on toilet paper.

We're discussing stuff...like how we're going to get Alex to football practice four days a week by 6:00 pm when we're living in another city.   I think if we keep him in the same daycare it will work until school starts in mid-August.  After that I'll have to drive from Dallas to Grapevine to Irving in the space of an hour.  Traffic is a concern.  I've considered hiring someone to drive Alex to practice.  I don't know how much that would be with the cost of gas going insane.  I ran into Coach Robert today.  I told him we're moving, but he can count on us.  I told him we planned our wedding date around the football season. He understood our priorities.

Time seems to have slowed down considerably and yet I'm worried about not having enough.  I don't think my sisters have ordered their dresses yet.  I have their jewelery in my office.  Chris keeps assuring me that it's going to be ok.  He tells me, ""Honey no one is going to show up naked.""  Leave it to a man to be logical.

I think my show is on.  Where is everybody?

and I’m *still* tired

Chris's parents came to visit this past weekend.  I don't know what they have to say about the whole thing, but I know they can't say they were bored.  Friday night, after work, we all had dinner at Whataburger and went to Six Flags.  We had coupons to get them in for $10.  Sweet!  Chris led the charge.  He has a far better sense of direction and familiarity with the park.  He took us from ride to ride to ride.  He was walking very fast and kept looking back at the rest of us and then looking at his watch.  The rest of us just weren't as motivated or energetic, but we tried not to fall too far behind.  We followed and rode more than people who had been there all day.  We got home after midnight.  Alex and Chris's dad stayed up and watched wrestling.  The rest of us crashed. 

The next day on the way to downtown Grapevine, Alex said, ""Hey dude..."" to Chris's dad.  I asked him since when we address adults as, ""hey dude"".  Chris's mom told Alex he could call her Brenda and her husband Wayne.  My son asks, ""Wayne?  Like Bruce Wayne?""  So he spent half the day saying, ""Bruce, I mean, Wayne...""  Then he gave up and it was, ""Bruce Wayne..."" and that was his name for the rest of the weekend.  Those two got along famously.  It was cute.  We went to the outdoor market and then got doughnuts.  Then we walked down to the lake.  Alex took his football and basketball.  They all played and looked at some wildflowers.  I lay there feeling like crap.  After that we went home and I took a nap. About half an hour later we went out to lunch, followed by the Art Show in Southlake. Then just for kicks, we went to the Rangers game.  They lost.  We once again got home around midnight.  This time everyone crashed.

Sunday morning Chris had to work from home so I got to talk to Chris's mom about a lot of stuff that morning in the kitchen.  She's sweet and funny.  We had peanut butter and tortillas for brunch.  We went out for dinner at Saltgrass, looked at the million dollar homes for sale (due to foreclosure, I'm sure) and then Alex and I had to go home.  Chris's parents left too.  It was a very full, fun weekend.  Chris's mom really misses him.  I told her the house down the street was for sale.  I promised not to borrow their lawnmower or park in their driveway.  I'm not sure she's ready to leave Iowa though.  Maybe she'll reconsider in time.

Lucky to be the one to be lucky

Last night was the Bon Jovi show...awesome as usual.  For a while I was worried that I wouldn't be able to go, but then I had hope again, then I was worried again and then I was relieved and then I was really happy.  See, what had happened was....

When the tickets originally went on sale, the available seats were crappy and it was Christmastime and I couldn't see spending the money for crappy seats.  Last month, I started looking around on Ebay.  I bid on several pairs only to be outbid time and time again by several hundred dollars.  I love Jon and the boys as much as the next person, probably more, but the prices were insane.  If I had an extra $2,000 laying around, I'd buy new bedroom furniture, not 3 hours of entertainment.  Last week I was bidding on two pairs of tickets, one went to $700, but somehow the pair I was bidding on went unnoticed by the masses and I won them for $242.50, including shipping on Wednesday.  Thursday, I check my email for confirmation and instead find an email saying that my payment didn't go through and to try it again.  I went to PayPal, saw it hadn't cleared and cancelled it and tried again and *that* didn't work so cancelled the second one,  too.  I had to go through PayPal and make a payment to the email address and noted what the payment was for and that one went through.  The guy's wife came to my job and delivered them in person on Friday afternoon.  Yay!  [Side note:  PayPal took money all three times so don't ask me to borrow money until my account is properly credited.]

Tickets in hand, Chris drove us to the show yesterday.  We arrived in time to look around at the various booths.  I signed up to win Dave Matthews tickets from the Mix, Stars tickets from Accuvue and then we were going to go inside, but I was distracted.  The Bone had Blaze of Glory, a Jovi cover band doing an accoustic set.  They were also doing a drawing for tickets in less than ten minutes.  Chris and I signed up and I won.  Chris says, ""Of course you won, honey.  You entered the drawing.""    After determining which set was better, we sold the other pair to a scalper.  It's easy to find the scalpers at the Jovi shows, they're black.  He paid me $100 after telling me that he'd give me $30 for both.  I said $100 cuz it was 7:15 and Daughtry started at 7:30.  He agreed to $80 and wouldn't budge.  I figured it was sunk cost and about to walk away with my tickets when we were approached by a second scalper, then suddenly the first guy had $100.  It was time to go inside so I didn't haggle further.

And then I got distracted again.  I think I have adult A.D.D.  This time it was the smell.  There was an exclusive Bon Jovi Experience party.  Basically, people who shelled out the big bucks got to sit around in a sectioned off area and act important.  I walked up to the back of the canopy where the food was being prepared and asked if I could get something to eat cuz it smelled so good.  The old guy told me in a thick accent that they were keeping the party seperate.  I said, ""but I didn't have a chance to eat.""  He smiled and said they want to keep it seperate.  I said, ""those rich white people don't appreaciate you and I'm hungry.""  He looked at me and said, ""You're hungry?  Just hold on, sweetheart.""  He came back with two skewers of fat shrimp.  They were fresh and hot.  Chris, who had enough sense to hang back, and I then walked out of view of the party staff/security so as not to get that nice man in trouble and had our snack.

Daughtry was okay.  I'm not a big fan and I think they're a little too impressed with themselves.  Bon Jovi was amazing, as I've come to expect.  They always go all out.  The screens were smaller, but moved during the show to face different ways or come together.  It made for a neat effect.  I was very disappointed with the crowd.  They were there, but kinda blah.  People left early.  I don't understand that.  The encores are always amazing and they come back as long as the energy is there.  Juana and I saw them at the Rosemont and they did five encores.  I guess people are used to substandard bands or they're dumb.  I'm not sure which.  Tony Romo was there though not in nearly as good a seat as I'd have if I had Tony-Romo money. 

I prattle on.  As soon as I get my picture from the Bone with me, Chris, Robert Miguel and Cindy Scull, I'll put that up.  I didn't sneak a camera in.  I think half the people there had BIG digital cameras.  Next time...

I'm all kinds of crazy

We went to Six Flags again today.  I rode the Titan.  I hate that ride and yet I go on it time and again.  I guess it's an adreneline thing or maybe a conquering my fears thing.  I'm not sure.  I have a dislike of heights and yet I'm alway going up somewhere that I don't need to be. 

I about had a fit Saturday at the Ranger's game.  We were up in section 325 and climbing the stairs, I was holding on to the rail like I'd fall backwards otherwise.  I thought all the happy smiling people were crazy.  I wanted to ask them all if they didn't realize that if the leaned too far forward that they would plummet to their deaths.  After the fifth inning, I settled down a little bit and I was able to enjoy the rest of the game more even though the Rangers lost.  It was pretty sad. 

Saturday morning Chris woke me up early (for me) and we went to a plant sale in Grapevine.  A gardening club was selling assorted plants they grew to raise money for college scholarships.  Chris bought plants for the two beds in his backyard.  Gardening in Texas is not like gardening in Indiana.  Down here you have to dig up the soil and mix it with compost and plant your plants and cover them with mulch.  In Indiana, you move the grass out of the way and toss seeds in the dirt.  The soil is black and you can grow just about anything when it stops being cold.  I'm considering tearing up a piece of the side yard and playing around, but I'm not sure.  It seems like an awful lot of work for tomatoes. 

We were supposed to plant the stuff on Saturday when we bought it, along with the mulch and manure from Home Depot, but it didn't happen that way.  The storm earlier this week knocked down a dead tree on the side of the house next to the street.  We broke it into pieces smaller than six feet and dragged it to the front curb so the city would haul it away.  There was another dead tree next to it so we tore it down and dragged it too.  Chris wanted to put it behind the fence.  The trash collection is on Wednesday and the neighbors don't like stuff to sit out.  But we both knew he wasn't coming home from work on Tuesday night and dragging it up there.  I should have kept my mouth shut.  Chris started sawing up the pieces of fence that the previous storm had blown down into 4' x 6' pieces.  We were out there for several hours and ended up with a pile of stuff 12' wide and at least 4' tall.  Gosh I hate physical labor.  Next time I'm hiring a Mexican.  Oh wait.  I am a Mexican...   But he weeded and mowed today and the yard looks really good.  I've got several projects in my head.  Does anyone know how to put up a retaining wall that won't fall over? 

We're at three months till the wedding.  I'm still not sure that my sisters have finalized the dress, but I'm not worried.  I've decided that if Chris and I are the only ones not wearing jeans, it's still gonna be great.  I've taken off the Friday before and the week after from work.  I'm still trying to get a committment from the photographer I want.  There are others available, but I really have my heart set on this guy.  Cross your fingers. 

Now that I'm branching out into my own family within the Family, I find I need to remember to look at things differently. My parents always told me that all I have is my sisters and them and that's all I'm ever going to have.  Life and losers have taught me that the old man knows his stuff.  That said, those who have stood the test of time know that they may as well change their last name because they've pretty much been adopted.  I'm embarrassed because I forgot that in adopting a new last name, I too am being adopted.

Normally, I consider myself a giving person, but I realize that when it comes to Alex, this is not the case.  Fortunately, My Honey has no problem calling me out when I'm wrong.  Not that I enjoy it, but I appreciate the honesty.  Honesty speaks volumes about the level of intimacy and comfort you share with someone.  I am humbled and I am sorry for saying that the repsonsibility of raising the boy can only be mine.  But in all fairness to me, I'm not used to being treated so well all the time.  I'm not used to a man standing up and being a man at all times.  I'm not used to having someone so wonderful think that I'm worth the hassle that is me.  And I'm definitely not used to someone saying they will be a provider, role model and father to my son and living up to that.   I am very fortunate and I will try to get used to having the Bestest Honey in the Universe. (oh the sacrifices I make.)

George or Jon?

"

As you may know, I’ve desperately been trying to get my hands on some Bon Jovi Tickets.  I am currently bidding in two auctions.  I’m also watching a couple of solo seats to see how they go.  I’d be willing to go alone if the price stays low.

While flipping through the radio dial last week, I learned the George Michael will be coming to town July 13th.  (that’s the day after the wedding for those of you keeping track)  I love his voice.  It’s good stuff.  Regular tickets went on sale today and despite the hefty price tag, I purchased a pair.

SECTION 118        ROW G         SEATS 6 & 7

Are those good seats, or what?  I mean, even with all the presales that were going on and the high interest since the man hasn’t done a show in the US for 17 years.  Damn.  Those are aweome.  Just awesome. I rule.

Here’s my ""problem"".  I still want to see Jon and the boys.  I could prbably Ebay these tickets for a good five times what I paid for them EASILY... But!  I’ve never seen George Michael in concert.  I’m betting that show will be pretty fucking sweet.  Chris and I could go to the show and leave for the honeymoon a day later than planned.  -OR-  I could sell these and have enough money to buy mediocre seats to both shows. -OR- I could keep the money and use it to buy wedding stuff.  -OR- I could do something noble.  Carrie (Chris’s sister) and Kris (my sister) are both really big fans and they could go together.  I just don’t know.  I really have to think on this one.  Ideas?

"

Cootie Update

Normally when I take Alex to the doctor, she (whoever it is) makes me feel like I’m a big doofus who’s wasting her time.  She usually tells me I’m overreacting and he’ll be just fine.  So today I seriously considered skipping the doctor visit, but I’m glad I didn’t.  Turns out he has strep throat and an ear infection.  She gave him Keflex which was over $60 and struck me as expensive for an antibiotic. (Hell, for $60 you’d think it was a pill to cure ugly.)

Anywhoo, we’re over at Chris’s house. Alex was instructed to rest, hang out on the couch and watch tv.  Chris has cable so we came here.  His fever is gone, he seems to feel better so I think he’ll go to school tomorrow.  I have to go today to pick up his homework and his basketball.

Get this, after school the kids were standing in the hallway waiting for the daycare vans.  Some little snot knocks Alex’s ball out of his hands and another, greener snot rolls it down the hall to the Principal.  The Principal, not seeing any of that transpire, took my son’s ball away and is holding it until I go pick it up.  Here’s my question, ""How are the other parents being inconvenienced?""  Two children misbehaved.  I didn’t give birth to either of them.  Why am I being punished?  I plan on giving him an earful.  A polite earful, but an earful nonetheless. 

Mama told me to buy some oral rinse/gargle that foams and makes you look like a mad dog.  That was $10.  Whatever happened to salt water?  I better get going.  If anyone knows any cheap ways of making him feel better, drop me a line.

Cooties for Alex

We didn’t go to Six Flags yesterday cuz the weather was supposed to be nicer today.  BUT, Alex woke up with an earache and a fever.  He’s been medicated and fed and he’s somewhat better.  The fever is still 100.5 two hours after ibuprofen and cold meds.  He insists he’s well enough to go to Six Flags, but we’ll be chillin around the house today.  He gave me a look that told me how unfair and cruel I am and how terrible his life is.  Yup.  World’s Worst Mother right here.

I offered to rent him a new game, but he’d not interested.  It’s probably for the best, I don’t want him getting too exited and heating up anymore.  I’m not sure why his fevers get so high and refuse to come down.  He’s always been that way.  I’d give him ibuprofen and a bath and we’d still end up at the E.R. in the middle of the night cuz I couldn’t get his fever under 103.  I don’t think I ever fully recovered from watching him have a febrile seizure, of which he has absolutely no memory.  The pharmacist told me to give him Tylenol, which I give him for normal stuff.  However, it is my experinence that it does not work as well on Alex’s fevers and only lasts about 2  hours. 

I made rice patties, but he only ate one cuz his throat hurts.  You know he’s sick when he won’t eat.  I also took a shot at making tortillas for the first time.  Alex gave them a 5 on a 25 point scale.  I don’t think they were quite that bad.  Chris at them.  We have popsicles in the freezer and those seem to be okay.  (Hey Juana, remember, "Alex want a popsicle? Noooo.")   I have to go check on my little booger.

a bunch of stuff

I don’t know where to start.  My mind has been busy being busy with incoherent nonsense.  I don’t know why.  I don’t have any definite source of stress.  Life is good.  It’s like the stain in the TideStick commercial is in my head. abooolah yah dala gaba gaba fobb.  I really need to find the source.  Today something pissed me off so bad I was shaking and it wasn’t a shake-worthy kind of thing.  Maybe it was.  It’s hard knowing that I’m a little crazy.  I have to stop and evaluate my reactions and weigh them against that.  It’s probably a lot easier to be wholly crazy and not care, but there are far too many people like that out there already.

New Topic:
We went to a new thrift store last week. It really rocks.  I got stuff.  We almost got some furniture, but someone else bought it by the time we thought to look twice. 

New Topic:
We need to to pick out invitations to the wedding.  We finally sent out all, but one of the Save the Date magnets.  Those were cute and I think most people checked out the website and know when the wedding is.  And yet, I’m still playing with wording and designs.  I’m considering buying the kind you get at Office Max and printing them myself.  It’s not hard.  The work is all in deciding what we want.  I’m not sure how I manage to be so opinionated and indecisive at the same time.

New Topic:
If the weather stays clear, we’re going to Six Flags this Saturday.  We may take some people although I’m not sure who.  Chris actually got Alex to ride a couple of the small coasters when they went last Monday.  I’m sure he’ll get braver as time goes by.  I don’t think I’ll be getting on any spinning things though.  I get dizzy so easily.  I used to be able to ride anything, but I get all queasy now.  Chris will ride anything with anyone.  He’s good to go.

New Topic:
I don’t get the whole ""organic"" food thing.  I’m not paying $8 for a gallon of organic milk.  I’ll stick to the inorganic kind.

New Topic:
I’ve been outbid on my Bon Jovi tickets and I just can’t justify spending more than I originally bid.  Don’t let me find the person who won.  I don’t know what I’d do.  It would probably involve crying and begging.

New Topic:
I’ve got a weird feeling like I’m missing something somewhere.  Usually, I’m rather perceptive, but I really feel like I’m not quite on the ball right now.  It’s all mixed up with dreams.  I have future-telling dreams.  Not Nostradamus stuff.  I have dreams of stuff that actually happens to me.  I never know when stuff will happen. I get this swirly feeling like I’m about to jump to the Territorries when dream-stuff actually happens.  Some of you may be thinking I sound like a total nut and I’m talking out of my ass.  You’re about half right...you can pick which half.

I miss Carol

Ah Carol... I used to work with her at the lawfirm.  She was Mort's secretary, still is, I understand.  We were night and day.  She was in her 60s...the kind of lady that went to the beauty shop once a week to get her hair and nails done.  I wore a bun most days and bit my nails compulsively.  When I first started working there, we didn't talk much and I got the feeling she didn't like me.  One day, I guess I'd been there for a year by then, they nervously asked me how I would feel about working closely with her.  I told them the God's honest truth: I can work with anyone as long as said person is willing to keep it professional. 

She and I are both strong personalities, but I think we both reconized that and we were very careful with each other at first.  But the more we worked together, the more we relaxed around each other.  There were days I exasperated her and days I had to bite my lip hard.   BUT!  I really enjoyed working with that woman.  She and I worked well together.  We got our work done, quickly and efficiently, without a lot of discussion or ego.  We both understood that getting the work done for the good of the company was the most important thing.  

When she'd go on vacation, Mort would ask me to do things he'd normally ask Carol to do and he'd ask other people to do the things that I didn't know how to do.  I don't know how Caro got it all done.  I remember the Tuesday after she had been gone only one day, I started marking a post-it not with strikes everytime Mort would annoy me.  By that Friday, I had filled up two post-it notes with about 50 marks.  I gave it to her that Monday and explained that I put a mark each time I thought, "I miss Carol".

Occassionally we'd disagree and look at each other with a look that said, "I can't believe this woman is so stubborn", but it didn't slow our overall progress.  Together we took collection files from less than $1,000 a month to over $30,000 a month when I left there.  Please understand, we didn't work on commission.  We worked because that's what we were supposed to do.  I loved her work ethic and dedication.  We never hung out socially.  I don't send her Christmas cards, but I respect her to this day. 

Six Flags is open

Yesterday was opening day at Six Flags over Texas.  Being season pass holders, we thought it a good a day as any to get out there.  The weather was sunny and in the 70s.  There were hardly any people there at all.  I'd recommend going now before the big crowds and three-digit temperatures arrive.

Alex played games with his money; he won a Superman cape, a miniature guitar, a pillow that looks like $100 bill and a blue frog that accidentally got left behind somewhere.  We rode a lot of rides... I had to trick my son into riding a couple, but he enjoyed them.  I think it's going to take someone at his level to talk him into roller coasters.  I think I was 13 before I got on one so it's not a big deal.  He patiently waited as we rode the Batman and the Titan.  FYI, there are no longer storage areas to cram your stuff when you get to the coasters.  Security won't let you take a drink, toy or anything you can't shove in your pocket as you get in line for the ride.  I wonder what caused that. 

I think my spine was snapped into correct positioning by the Miner train and undone by the Viper. Ah well. 

Chris added parking to his season pass so we can pretty much go whenever we want and not spend a whole lot of money.  We even got two souvenir cups so we get $ .99 refills all year.  Of course the cups were $12.99 each, but we had coupons to get $3 off each.  It's cheaper than $3 a pop for each of us everytime we go.  We've got coupons to take people for free when we go on holidays and discount coupons for other days.  We don't often plan ahead so if anyone wants to go, let us know.

the first wedding-related argument

I asked my mom to gather the addresses of family members who I might invite to the wedding.  We agreed on the guest list, that is, "No Haters".  So today after a month of reminding her and her promising to get back to me, she called.  Her list was full of haters.  I told her which ones I didn't need because I'm not inviting them.  She was not happy and now I am not happy.  She told me to be polite and invite them cuz they won't come.  She said that they don't have money to travel and get a hotel and all that.  I know better.  I know all they have to do is ask my dad for money and then he'll feel obligated.  He'll pay their way to come annoy me.  They'll eat and drink and be ugly and bring all 20 of their children and down syndrome grandkids.  Or maybe they won't come.  But I can't count on maybe.  And I don't want to waste the postage on anyone who's never so much as sent me a birthday card.

Then she plays the but-your-dad card.  But your Dad would want his family there.  But your Dad will say if they're not invited that he's not coming.  Now, I haven't talked to my Dad and I need to before there's a problem.  It's not an argument I want to have.  I hope it's not one that becomes necessary.

I think Mom wants to have a huge family gathering.  I think part of her sees a mariachi band and a pinata.  I think that if my parents really wanted to have that party, my 15th birthday passed and that chance has gone by.  I think she was a little resentful when I suggested that if they wanted to pay for the wedding they could decide the guest list.  She said we were already arguing and I hadn't even invited her yet.  I don't even know how to respond to that.

Chris and I want to celebrate our marriage with people we love.  I really wish it was that simple.

XM is not immune

Chris, Alex and I are often listening to Lucy, the XM radio station, on Saturday night.  It's one of the alernative stations that we listen to anyway.  Saturdays, along with the usual alertnative stuff, you can hear  all kinds of weird songs that you probably don't know exist by bands that can't even be classified as one-hit wonders.  They also have "Cheap Prize Giveaways" ...every week brings new, cheap, stupid prizes.  This week in honor of President's Day on Monday, they had something they got at the dollar store, which was purchased with a dollar featurning George Washington's picture, your choice of Dolly Madison Zingers of Sweet Buns and a picture of the President of your choice, except for assasinated Presidents. During the evening they'd play a sound bite of Ronald Reagan and you had to be the seventh caller.  So we were driving along and they played it and I couldn't get my phone out of my pocket.  Finally I got it out and dialed and we won.  The three of us were laughing as I gave the lady answering the phone my mailing address.  I chose Zingers and Martin Van Buren, who invented the apostrophe.  They are sending me a bottle of rainbow sprinkles they got from the dollar store.  They're sending Tim, another winner, red press-on nails.  The dj kept repeating my name on the radio.  I got a big kick out of it.  It's funny how small, silly things can make me laugh.  Oh, and it was just announced that I am tonight's Grand Prize Winner!  I get pictures of all the assasinated Presidents.  How 'bout that?  My lucky dialing finger continues to exert it's magic, even over satellite radio.

...but I hate microsoft paint

I love my boss.  I've told you why before and I'm sure I will again.  But sometimes he confuses me.  He walked into my office and I didn't get what he was talking about until later. 

I generally get an instant vibe off people before they've even opened their mouths.  I'm generally right and often they have no idea how I've instantly judged them.  I'm right so often that I really shouldn't be surprised by the latest backstabbing.  I'm not technically surprised by the stabbing, only by the lack of creativity in the jab.  It wasn't a death blow.  It just gets old sewing up the backs of my shirts.  Oh well.

I LIVE MY LIFE OUT LOUD.  I think I read that on a tshirt once.  I like it.  It fits.  As you're probably aware, this page is public, as are most of my blogs.  I keep it that way mostly for my friends  who are MySpace snobs.  I keep it that way because I think the world is entitled to know my thoughts.  I keep it that way because I'm entitled to share my thoughts.  I keep it that way because there's nothing I'll say here that I won't say in any other arena. 

I like to think that my readers are my friends and family.  I write and I can picture them reading my latest installment of nonsense.  It helps.  I like to know that someone cares about my bad day or bad mood or good news or good hair days.  It's reassuring and I appreciate it. 

I don't like to think of my other readers and yet they pop their two cents in more often than people who I actually like.  Weird.  I'm no Paris Hilton so I really don't understand why I have so many haters.  It could be worse.  I could be an East Coast Rapper.  (RIP Tupac)

Sometimes I go through a normal day and do normal stuff and nothing really exciting happens.  There are no real low points or high points worth mentioning.  But that's sucky-ass writing/reading material and I'd rather go clearance shopping.  Sometimes I bitch about my day or a specific thing.  Funny how that's what people focus on -- a sentence or two in a moment of frustration.  Gosh.  I can't tell me how that makes me feel.

Thanks for reading my online blogs...I mean, ""doodles on the computer"".  Doodles.  Pfft.